You may not know but you can have a funeral with the coffin anywhere you have permission, it doesn't have to be the crematorium.

Wedding venues during midweek can make beautiful places to honour and say goodbye.

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You can have a moment during the funeral when guests are invited to write a blessings or farewell note that can then be attached the coffin. This gives a wonderful opportunity for people to gift their love in a practical way as well as sending your relative off in a cacoon of love. 

Gifting guests a seedling, some seeds or a plant can be a beautiful offing helping to keep the memory of your loved one alive and strong as they tend to their plant long after the funeral ceremony. 

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This is a beautiful ceremony to involve guests, especially for a burial, they can write their blessing on some dissolvable paper and when invited place into the bowl of water. This water can then be used to 'water' the grave, gifting your loved one all the loving intention of the words written. 

You can pick flowers from your garden and dry the petals in preparation to place in the coffin/basket with your loved one. You can either do this yourself or ask the funeral director to do this on your behalf. Flowers have always represented our love and regard for each other and so it can be a beautiful last act of love for your relative to encompass them with such beauty and love. 

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Many families like to pick and arrange flowers and foliage from their own garden. By doing this you give yourself the opportunity to physically create a beautiful offering for your relative or friend, which is so much more precious than shop bought flowers. If you don't have a garden you might have a local flower grower where you can go and pick your own. Herbs make a wonderful offering for guests to place on the coffin or in the grave. 

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A funeral or celebration of life is a wonderful opportunity to capture  the myriad of stories and memories everyone has of the person who has died. You can do this by providing a memory book or invite people to write down/print their memories and stories to bring with them on the day which you can then stick into a memory book. 

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Many people will have either a vicar or a funeral celebrant leading the ceremony, whether a celebration of life or a more traditional funeral, acting as a wonderful guide for you all on the day. The best ceremonies have always been when family & friends have written the majority of the script though, you knew them best, you are the best one's to get their personality across, know and can articulate your favourite memories best. So be brave and put pen to paper, or fingers to computer keys! Your words will be a gift to other's. 

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A ceremony of light can be a beautiful way, either as a stand alone or as part of a funeral, to honour your relative or friend. It creates a moment of loving intent giving space for connection between those present as well as an opportunity for blessing for the person who has died. 

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According to a peer reviewed paper , of all the mammals on earth 96% are livestock & humans with only 4% wild mammals. We only have 3% of our wildflowers left in the UK. Cremation accounts for 534.6 pounds of carbon dioxide per single cremation. Our earth is struggling to sustain us and YOU can help. Natural burials are sacred & vital aspects to sustaining our children's future. 

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Invite all your guests to bring one or a few copies of photos they have of your relative to share with everyone on the day and for you to keep. These can spark wonderful conversations and opportunities to learn aspects of the person you may not have been aware of. 

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Food unites us all, we gather with friends and family to eat and celebrate. Many families still sit around a dinner table to catch up with each other's lives.  We all have our favourites and our dislikes! Your loved one will have had theirs and so it can be a lovely aspect of a goodbye ceremony to include some of these favourite and most hated of foods! This offers a wonderful opportunity for connection, conversations and memories as you share.

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You may want to choose the option of a direct cremation or direct natural burial so you don't have an actual funeral, instead having a memorial or celebration of life of your choosing. Many people like to have a memorial walk that includes stopping off for a lovely lunch somewhere. This can be a lovely way to reflect, connect and remember in a relaxed way with all those who love the person who has died.

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Whether your loved one was a musician or just a fan of music, having live music at a funeral is both a powerfully emotional experience and a wonderful offering of your love for the person who has died.

What genre of music is allowed at a funeral? 

Absolutely anything. 

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Respect is honouring the person who has died, not other's expectation of what a funeral should be. 

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